Personal Values
What is self-esteem?
According to Wikipedia:
In psychology, self-esteem reflects a person's overall evaluation or appraisal of his or her own worth.
Synonyms or near-synonyms of self-esteem include: self-worth,[1] self-regard,[2] self-respect,[3][4] self-love (which can express overtones of self-promotion),[5] self-integrity. Self-esteem is distinct from self-confidence and self-efficacy, which involve beliefs about ability and future performance.
So how does one go about instilling something like self-esteem, self-worth and self-love in their children? Particularly when a parent has their OWN issues with self-esteem? I think we all have moments where we question our self-worth. Its such an easy trap to get into, but the last thing I think any of us want to do is to cause our children to question theirs.
According to Kidshealth.org:
What Is Self-Esteem?
To understand self-esteem, it helps to break the term into two words. Let's take a look at the word esteem first. Esteem is a fancy word for thinking that someone or something is important or valuing that person or thing. For example, if you really admire your friend's dad because he volunteers at the fire department, it means you hold him in high esteem. And the special trophy for the most valuable player on a team is often called an esteemed trophy. This means the trophy stands for an important accomplishment.
And self means, well, yourself! So put the two words together and it's easier to see what self-esteem is. It's how much you value yourself and how important you think you are. It's how you see yourself and how you feel about your achievements.
Self-esteem isn't bragging about how great you are. It's more like quietly knowing that you're worth a lot (priceless, in fact!). It's not about thinking you're perfect — because nobody is — but knowing that you're worthy of being loved and accepted.
I like how the kidshealth website breaks it down for a kid to understand and hey it helps an adult too! I once held my self in higher regard, felt I was a catch for sure and didn't have any doubts I would find my way in life. However, through the years, that worth has wained a bit here and there. Life has gotten in the way of how I see myself many times. I think as parents we always question ourselves whether its our self worth or our ability to parent. I think the fact that we are raising two little girls makes it even more important. I know girls tend to have lower self-esteem than boys, its a product of our own making. I have been raised in a family of strong, self-less women who give themselves to and for everyone else, and while that in and of itself is a good thing, it has sometimes backfired. I don't think that many of these amazing women have high self-esteem, some if any at all. So its a trend and one that I am finding myself sinking into.
Now lets look at the obvious. I have many blessings in my life, more than I can ever count! We have two healthy, happy and wonderful little girls. I have a wonderful husband who I consider my best friend. I have a decent-paying job, (heck I have a job which is hard to say in this economy!) and we have a great extended family! But there are still moments when little zaps of self-doubt creep in. How do you fight those off and win? And how do you keep those issues from rubbing off onto our children?
We are all a work in progress and sometimes the progress part is the part that hards to swallow. Its finding that happy medium and digging in deep to make sure we all feel good about who we are and what we have to offer.
So as mommy works to find more value in herself, I am going to take this opportunity to help the girls grow in their own self-worth and value as well!
According to Wikipedia:
In psychology, self-esteem reflects a person's overall evaluation or appraisal of his or her own worth.
Synonyms or near-synonyms of self-esteem include: self-worth,[1] self-regard,[2] self-respect,[3][4] self-love (which can express overtones of self-promotion),[5] self-integrity. Self-esteem is distinct from self-confidence and self-efficacy, which involve beliefs about ability and future performance.
So how does one go about instilling something like self-esteem, self-worth and self-love in their children? Particularly when a parent has their OWN issues with self-esteem? I think we all have moments where we question our self-worth. Its such an easy trap to get into, but the last thing I think any of us want to do is to cause our children to question theirs.
According to Kidshealth.org:
What Is Self-Esteem?
To understand self-esteem, it helps to break the term into two words. Let's take a look at the word esteem first. Esteem is a fancy word for thinking that someone or something is important or valuing that person or thing. For example, if you really admire your friend's dad because he volunteers at the fire department, it means you hold him in high esteem. And the special trophy for the most valuable player on a team is often called an esteemed trophy. This means the trophy stands for an important accomplishment.
And self means, well, yourself! So put the two words together and it's easier to see what self-esteem is. It's how much you value yourself and how important you think you are. It's how you see yourself and how you feel about your achievements.
Self-esteem isn't bragging about how great you are. It's more like quietly knowing that you're worth a lot (priceless, in fact!). It's not about thinking you're perfect — because nobody is — but knowing that you're worthy of being loved and accepted.
I like how the kidshealth website breaks it down for a kid to understand and hey it helps an adult too! I once held my self in higher regard, felt I was a catch for sure and didn't have any doubts I would find my way in life. However, through the years, that worth has wained a bit here and there. Life has gotten in the way of how I see myself many times. I think as parents we always question ourselves whether its our self worth or our ability to parent. I think the fact that we are raising two little girls makes it even more important. I know girls tend to have lower self-esteem than boys, its a product of our own making. I have been raised in a family of strong, self-less women who give themselves to and for everyone else, and while that in and of itself is a good thing, it has sometimes backfired. I don't think that many of these amazing women have high self-esteem, some if any at all. So its a trend and one that I am finding myself sinking into.
Now lets look at the obvious. I have many blessings in my life, more than I can ever count! We have two healthy, happy and wonderful little girls. I have a wonderful husband who I consider my best friend. I have a decent-paying job, (heck I have a job which is hard to say in this economy!) and we have a great extended family! But there are still moments when little zaps of self-doubt creep in. How do you fight those off and win? And how do you keep those issues from rubbing off onto our children?
We are all a work in progress and sometimes the progress part is the part that hards to swallow. Its finding that happy medium and digging in deep to make sure we all feel good about who we are and what we have to offer.
So as mommy works to find more value in herself, I am going to take this opportunity to help the girls grow in their own self-worth and value as well!
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