Sunday, September 25, 2016

Random musings

It is almost October. We are rolling into one of my favorite times of the year. Ok, let's be honest, I find something I like about every time of the year, but fall is always so restful. The weather change, the clothing required, hoodies, comfy pants, snuggling under a blanket around a bonfire. I love it. The apple smells, the pumpkin smells, the warm soups, the crunch of leaves that are so beautiful its a shame to see them fall. I love Halloween, and kiddos in cute costumes. Wow, I sound all mushy and mom like. Weird.

Maybe it is the weather today. So much nicer than the ball of humidity we walked around in yesterday. I don't mind heat, but that whole humidity that makes your lungs feel like they can pop, I don't find anything favorite in that.

I am avoiding my homework tonight. I have to write about an article I found and how it relates to the every so boring textbook we have for the class. I found an article on the BBC, one of the only resources I can use. I am not feeling anything about it other than I don't feel like doing it. It isn't due just yet, but I like to be way ahead of schedule on assignments. A far cry from my last go at college, where my best work was the night before it was due. But this whole mom, wife, working full time, driving a portable locker room thing, makes me have go plan things out a bit more than I did back then.

But avoidance is my game tonight. I will still mop the floors and fold laundry. So at least part of my list will be accomplished.

Thankfully our middle school daughter isn't the queen of procrastination yet. She is rocking 7th grade. She is making friends and busting her 4.2 GPA behind! So proud of her. It is weird to see her growing up. I was warned the jump from elementary school to middle school would be huge. I didn't believe it, I was in total denial. But here we are. She is growing in so many ways. I am very proud of her. I would love to be half the person she is. She amazes me.

Our 6th grader is rocking the school year too. She has a teacher who is giving her a chance to be herself without any pretenses. I love that. Her teacher is young but not naive, and has developed a good bond with her. I so appreciate teachers that allow children to prove themselves rather than prove their previous teacher or teachers wrong. She is thriving in math and socially. She has found out the hard way, that some kiddos are exposed to so much more than she is. We have had to have some pretty honest and grown up conversations this year already. But I love her strength and her bravery.

Kris and I are at the crossroads of our weight loss journey. No more losses but thankfully no gains. Gotta try something new and work on the fitness aspect of it now. I've got a 5K or two to run in November. Let's get this party started...

Tuesday, July 26, 2016

This crazy thing called life...

I am very blessed to have spent this summer home with our girls. We have had some great times, and it usually carries over to great family time. Lots of softball, but lots of swimming, fun with friends, fun with family and most of all, lots of time to snuggle. We've had some lazy days, which are very much needed. And we have had days where we busted our behinds from sun up to sun down. So much to be thankful for.

We have had some tough lessons this summer too. A toxic situation with a family member turned nasty. That has since put Kris and I over the edge and no second chances will be given. This person is not worth any more words. Relief. Done.

Big P starts middle school in 3 weeks! What?! It seems like yesterday she was walking through the doors of her elementary school for the first time. Time so flies when you have kids of your own. I am excited for her though. There are so many new opportunities coming her way. New friends, new academic challenges, as she was one of 52 7th graders selected for honors math. She is a human calculator. Not sure where that comes from, but more power to her and we fully support her. I can't wait to see her bloom and take flight!

This is Little P's last year in elementary school. She was downstairs in the 6th grade wing for 5th grade simply because her class is so large, so it won't be that big of a change for her. I am hoping her ENT surgery this summer will work some magic for her and her sleeping. I hope to see that carry over into the classroom and give her more confidence. And I truly hope whoever her teacher is this year, they will give her a chance and avoid the gossip from a previous teacher that carried over into last year. She is smart and sassy, and I do not care for people who want to crush that. She knows the difference between being those things and being disrespectful, which she is not. So here's to a new school year with new beginnings and new blessings!

I am back in the same classroom that I love dearly! A great group of kiddos, most of which I worked with in preschool. And new opportunities as well as I have been accepted into the Para to Teacher program at our local college. The district pays a portion of the tuition, so it may be slow going at first.  But at some point in the near future, I will be a SPED teacher! So exciting. I love teaching. It is truly the best job out there. Well except maybe being a writer...still working on that one.

Life isn't always easy. But nothing worth it ever is. We have some bumps in our life. Post-fire things to tackle. Sometimes it can be overwhelming, but Kris and I are tackling them together and have big goals and plans. Sometimes we change those as needed. But we hope to set a good example to our girls every chance we get. And the fire definitely taught us what is worth our time and money and what isn't. Perspective. It is all a beautiful journey in this crazy thing we call life.

The P's and their sleepover buddies visiting Kris on the ambulance. We are a fun family!

Little P and her teammate K. This girl really worked hard to make sure P felt like part of the team. We are sad that the team is ending, but will do our best to make sure these friendships continue no matter.

Big P has been on the field for 8 years now! She loves it again, which is so important. Her new team and organization welcomed her with open arms and we have seen her grow! She moves up a level this year, and she may be pretty familiar with her new coaches!

I love this little guy. The youngest of the grandkids. Sadly, I don't know how much I will get to see him due to a toxic situation. But what a blessing his ornery spirit is. Love those snuggles this summer.
 Kris and I have been together for 17 years this summer and married for 14. It hasn't been an easy ride, but nothing worth anything is. I am grateful for the past couple of years, which have been our hardest, because we found our foundation again. I get to spend my life with my best friend.

This girl is so brave. Left her comfort zone between fall and Spring, and rocked the ball field. She got some new opportunities, and learned where she really wants to be. I hope that spark continues!

Monday, June 27, 2016

Random Mondayness

It is now the time of summer where things are winding down while other things are just getting started. This softball season is getting ready to end. Big P has her last tourney in Nebraska next weekend. Little P may not be on hand as she had her tonsils and stuff out last week. Thankfully Kris is home one of the days as it falls between his shift days, but a good family friend will have Little P on the second day so I can cheer Big P on. Little P has two more tournaments, one in a couple of weeks which is State and not too far of a drive in KC. The other is World Series which is four hours away and of course Kris can not take off, the fire captains usually take all summer, so the other guys are kind of screwed. Kind of annoying but he did try. So the P's and I will have a girls trip. Two trips, back to back, just me and a P or two. Should be fun!

Big P is in a tough spot for softball. She has a late December birthday which falls right before the age deadline and usually puts her with older girls who are in her grade. I dislike this big time. But thankfully and hopefully her new trainer and the new organization we are in, will take good care of her and assure she has good teammates. I don't want her playing with HS girls, but it may fall that way. We shall see. Upside for her, she can wear metal cleats. I never wore those but hey more power to her I guess. Little P has to move up too. I was wishing they could play together for a year, but alas that is not in the cards. I think she will make a move to the same organization Big P is in. That is the plan at least. Crazy to think it is so close to winding down.

However, I do like that we have some summer left before school starts. But that is just around the corner too. CRAZY! I have been working hard at organizing and getting rid of things. I am finally going through the fire boxes the cleaning company brought over after we moved back in. There are roughly 20-22 boxes that are half full with either pictures or artwork or random whatever they could save type of stuff. I have gone through 5 so far this past week. I have completely organized all of the pictures we have printed, which is A LOT! I had started scrapbooking a few years ago. Let me clarify by saying STARTED. I did not finish the two books I began, but Big P and I knocked those out the other night. I have so many pictures printed to scrapbook so I guess I will go and buy a few more books. I don't know how wild and crazy I will get on those, but at least if the pictures are in a book then I will feel better. I need to go through the external hard drive and see what other pictures they could save off my old computer. I love taking pictures but damn I need to get better and organizing them!

So that is my randomness for today....extra kiddos on hand as I am watching a friend's daughter this summer. Her step brother is here for a couple of days as well, and our 5 year old niece and 3 year old nephew are here as their dad and Kris are working a horrible accident. So sad to think two people started their day like normal and won't be going home to their families tonight. Even more sad to think about what my husband has to see in those situations.

Friday, June 10, 2016

Summer, summertime....

Summer break is here. I am so glad it is. It has been a very good break for the girls and I so far. Kris has been home as much as he can. He is trying to find a good balance between work and home. So far, so good. It is a good thing to be home this summer, and I appreciate the hard work he puts in so that can happen. I am watching some kiddos off and on and working on a freelance project, so that helps too.

Softball season is in full swing. Both girls are enjoying their new teams and new experiences. Both girls are also enjoying the summer break of being home more and enjoying time together. I love this feeling. I hope it is the beginning of a better journey for us all.

I am a little sad to think about big P going to middle school in August. Such a big change, but a needed one. She has to grow. Little P will be in 6th grade. Sigh...time does need to slow down some. Please.

Lots of projects to do around the house. Spent a little time being lazy and on here today. Gotta get up and around and back at it.

Here's a few pics of our summer so far. Very blessed!

Monday, April 11, 2016

Take me out to the ballgame....

So here we are! Softball season is in full swing. P2 started her season last weekend with her new team. P1 starts her's this weekend with her new team. Unfortunately, they are in tournaments at the same time in two places. Fortunately though, this doesn't seem to be a repeat for the rest of the season. In fact, one weekend, they will be in the same tournament! Does not mean the same ball park, but little steps are much improvement. Both are thriving with their new coaches, trainers and teammates. And I am very impressed with their growth as well as their coaches' organization. I have the summer already mapped out. Scary! But super exciting!

P2 played her old team for the championship. Her new team took 2nd while they took 1st. While she was disappointed in wanting to do better, but she played her butt off! 11 stolen bases, 7 RBI's including two singles turned doubles and three singles. I think she wanted to prove something but she did, to all of us who have been cheering her on from the beginning. Sadly, we saw the nasty side of her old team on some levels, but thankfully we were able to see the friendships still lasting. I know her new coach can't wait to hand it to them next time. But we will have a few tourneys before we see them again. Thankful for the new team and new friendships developing. She is growing so much!
P1 is enjoying her new team and her new nickname, Cheesecake. She is doing so well behind the plate. I love watching both of them play and hope to be able to see both of them do what they love this weekend! We will be dividing and conquering for sure but so worth it!

Kris and I have been working hard on losing weight. A very strict, clean eating diet. He is on week 4, I am going into week 3. He is down 50 as of today and I'm down 21 as of today. A great catapult to what we can accomplish. The weight loss is so different than any other time before. I am excited to see what I am capable of and what my body is capable of. I don't like to brag or anything like that but I am excited and very proud of us both. I would be lying if I didn't say the food part was hard, because oh it is! But being fat and unhealthy is even harder. I'm so over that part of life.

Monday, March 21, 2016

Checking in

Oh Spring Break, how I love thee. It was a crazy start, with lots of kiddos coming to and fro as we helped out friends who needed some childcare. It worked out, big P's best friend and his little brother got to hang out with us for like 12 hours. It was pretty fun hearing him say, "Miss Liz we had breakfast, lunch AND dinner with you guys." The end of the week, we literally Netflix binged and rested. My girls are seeing their upcoming softball schedule, and while they're excited, they knew this might be some of our last times to be "lazy" and snuggle endlessly. I may regret some of this laziness tomorrow morning when those alarms for school go off. Until then, I am enjoying the snuggles, especially with little P, who has been very little lately. I think it is easy to forget she is only 10, and while she acts "grown", she isn't.

Kris has an interview this morning, for a job I am sure he is the perfect fit for. I am trying to not be overly optimistic or giddy, but I truly feel he is the man for the job. It is a new position at his fire department and would allow him to teach others how to treat patients and do better on medical calls. So today we pray. He could be home more, which is very important to him and our girls, and me too of course. It would take some flexibility, as I'm used to running the show on my own. But man, it would be so worth it!

Today I am supposed to be loading up on good and bad fat. But man, I am not hungry. I am forcing myself to eat cereal, which is one of my favorite things to eat but is NOT on the plan I am about to embark on. Today, I may just get a slice of red velvet cheesecake from Cheesecake Factory, just to go out with a bang. Total willpower and discipline are what is in store. By this time next year, I will be 100 lbs lighter. Well that is the number we are shooting for. There is a certain number I can not wait to destroy on the way. No more talking, just doing. Going to smash the shit out of some goals and then some.

Softball season is upon us. Both girls have left their previous teams, teams they spent a lot of time and tears with. But I support their choices and am excited to see how they thrive under new coaches and a new mentality. I love spending our weekends at the ballfields. Only ball parents would understand.

On to the cleaning I have on my list, that didn't quite get done last week....

Saturday, January 16, 2016

Hear that sound? Me neither.
Ok so there are sounds, coffee being made, people chatting, random Starbucks music, you get the idea.
But I am by myself most of the day. Minus the break for lunch. But the girls and their classmates are spending the day at an orchestra workshop. Tomorrow, they will show off what they've learned in a huge concert hall here in KSU. So for the 7 hours I have to entertain myself, I am spending a majority of them here at the fancy little Starbucks across the street. I may change things up a bit and find a mom and pop place for the afternoon, if I can't check into our hotel room early. But it is nice to be alone to my own thoughts. Not that I mind my P time, but sometimes, my own time is amazing. 
I wish it wasn't 21 degrees out. I would go run. But I am not feeling it. The cold wind in my lungs brings up the fun cough I had over Christmas break. So, no running on campus. 
I've spent the last 2 hours organizing my pictures on my Mac. I really wish I had brought our external hard drive to transfer most of them over, but at least they're all organized and pretty. I guess one beast at a time.

2016 is here. Not too bad of a start I would say. It has been a little busy, but not too crazy. I am hoping some of the positive changes we've made as a family will continue through out the year. And I am hoping that changes both Kris and I have made for ourselves will continue as well and spread like fire. I am hopeful. A few weeks ago, I was on the edge of not being hopeful. That wasn't a pretty place. But I am human, so my super hero ability to give Grace sometimes falters. Damn that humanness. Thankfully, it is understood and the communicating has been the best its ever been, so far.

We have our parent meeting at the middle school in a month. WHAT?! Middle school? Can someone tell time to slow down and tell Mother Nature to kiss my..... well you get it. Big P is excited and will do fine, but has some nervous moments. I am a hot mess. When did my little girl get to be so grown? She has matured so much in the past year. Thankfully, she still needs her mama from time to time. But her mind, her heart and her spirit amaze me most days. 

Little P won't be too far behind. YIKES! I may have to take up yoga or something when that happens. This is a bit stressful. She has been in the middle of hormone central with boys asking her out etc. Thankfully my little chats about having time for that kind of things LATER seem to be paying off, for now. Her best friend is a boy, a coworker and good friend's son. I have a feeling those two are going to give us some gray hairs. But I love watching them together.

I have some writing projects coming up. I am both excited and a little anxious. Finding the time will be my biggest challenge. Especially since I will have some random kiddos coming to our house this summer, but the extra income will be nice on both avenues. We've got our next DW trip to pay for so anything is helpful, especially as we snowball our way out of this Post Fire Debt. 

Life is beautiful. Life is ugly. Life can be in between, it all depends on how you handle it. Today, I handled it with humor, a book, some caffeine and later this evening popcorn and chlorine. But most of all, I handled it with grace.