Awhile back, I can't remember when exactly, I was pondering the meaning of life, mine in particular. I think it was around the time I felt life, my life, was slipping out of my hands. I felt that I needed to be "something" or do "something" that was worthy, that there had to be a job my husband and others could feel good saying I did. I thought at one point that job was a nurse. Not just any nurse, but an OB nurse. I thought that after the wonderful experiences I had having the P's, that it would only be natural to jump into that field. I thought about this, dreamt about this job for a long time. But reality set in, and after some careful thought, I realized I'm too emotionally attached to people to be a nurse. So I kept searching and kept wondering what my purpose was. I mean, apparently it wasn't as a Sports Anchor like I had dreamt of in high school and my first few years in college. I spent 10 years in television only to decide it wasn't my passion. Don't get me wrong, I love to write, I could spend all day writing, and writing. But the industry of TV is so different now, it is no longer a public service. It is now a sales-driven, political machine that makes it near impossible to have a family and be successful in that industry. So, I don't look back at my life in TV and wish I could go there again, that door has been closed. About a year ago, I got it in my head that I could share my love of writing with others and this lead me to thoughts of teaching. And not just any kind of teaching, but life as a high school Journalism/English teacher. I mean, I absolutely loved every moment of my journalism classes in high school. And despite a few eccentric teachers, I enjoyed English in high school too! And I still may pursue this career path, it works great with who I am and it would allow me more time with the P's which I seek. However, as I look back at what I've dreamt about being my entire life, whether its a sportscaster on ESPN, or my secret (not so secret anymore) dream of writing screenplays, I have realized that all of my hopes and dreams have already came true. They are found in the two little girls that God has trusted Kris and I with, my dreams are lived every day in the P's. Through their giggles, their smiles, their hugs and their kisses. Every breath they take is everything I could've dreamt of and more. So whether or not I'm a teacher, or I'm working in a bank or not working at all, my purpose is that of their mother, and it is a joy I could never thank God enough for.
Parker's turning 3!
It's been almost 3 years since we met Parker. She was a surprise baby to us, one we hadn't planned for but one that has changed our lives in ways we never imagined. She has always seem to have this knowledge of her presence in our lives, as a blessing more than anything else. She is our little calmer, she has this uncanny way of coming up to me when I'm at my worst and putting her sweet hand on my face and helping bring a sudden calm over me. Now don't get me wrong, she is a BUSY, BUSY little girl. From the moment she wakes up to the moment she finally gives in to sleep at night, that little girl has things to do. Whether it's dressed up in high heels and carrying a purse or finding a way to drive her big sister crazy, Parker is always up for a challenge. I can't believe our baby is already turning 3! She kept her end of the deal this summer, we told her if she could potty-train, we'd send her to sister's pre-school. Well guess who's potty-trained...
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