This is the face of our oldest P. In a month and a half, she will be 5-years-old and a "whole handful" she reminds me. And of course, I remind her that she's been a "handful" her entire life, which makes me laugh, but leaves her with a puzzled look. She is going through a stage lately that makes me incredibly sad. Big P, is such a sweet girl, she truly is. She is smart, funny, beautiful inside and out and a relatively good kid. However, when it comes to our relationship, she is in the phase where mommy doesn't know anything, and she feels the need to remind me of this. No, she hasn't come out and called me stupid, but she is quick to talk back to me and quick to shoot me looks of anger. I don't think she knows the power of those looks, they break my heart. I've heard from friends with little girls the same age who say they're experiencing the same thing with their daughters. But it doesn't make the hurt any less. When did my sweet little girl become so mean? Is it my fault? I know I've been distracted with a few issues over the past year and she probably heard more and saw more than she was quite ready for so I have to question whether or not I've caused this little girl to be so mean? I truly hope this is just a phase, and one that will end on a good note. I miss my sweet P! She still lets me play and snuggle with her sometimes, but not as often as I'd like or I should. I know I shouldn't let 5-10 minutes of this behavior ruin an entire day with her, but it still hurts.
I know its just a matter of time before little P hits this stage, but for now, she is all about me. Which makes me a little sad for daddy, but she is getting better about sharing her kisses, and snuggles and
love-on's! She is not afraid to yell "I love you mama!" across a room of people. She is very clingy lately though, and is constantly my little hip monkey as I like to call her. Sometimes, Kris will say it just doesn't seem like she's growing up as fast as big P did. I still think its going way too fast with both of them. Part of me is so excited to see them learn new things and enjoy their new independence, the other part of me wants to bottle this time up forever!
We took the P's to feed the ducks and geese yesterday, among other warmer weather activities. Little P slept through most of it but it gave Kris and Big P the chance to spend some time together. I sat across the pond, holding our sleeping 3-year-old, while daddy and our oldest bonded over bread and quacks. It was such a joy to watch the two of them, and to hold little P close as she slept. I'll post some Halloween pictures once I get to steal some from Kris' camera!
Comments