The, the, the GRINCH

I am feeling very Grinch like this holiday season. And not in a funny, Jim Carrey kind of way. I know Christmas doesn't sneak up, but this year it truly has felt that way. Maybe it is because Thanksgiving was so late? Or maybe because someone has a 10th birthday this month and I'm not quite ready for the double digits with our daughters yet. Or maybe I have had my fill of family and family drama, choices and bullshit? Or maybe its just the financial aspect of it. I am usually way more prepared than I was up until a week ago. I do not like waiting until the last minute. But I also do not like the materialistic approach we have all taken on this holiday anyway. See, there I go, all Bah Humbugging.

I normally love this time of year. The magic, the surprise of giving someone something, whether its a pay it forward kind of thing, like buying someone's coffee. Or bell ringing to help those in need, or just the fun of bringing neighbors baked goods. I love watching the excitement in the girls' eyes. But sadly, as I type this, I see that is missing too. Sigh.

I know our family usually revolves around my tone, my emotions. And while that is unfair at times, it is what it is and I need to set a better tone. I need to put my Grinch like attitude away and enjoy this Christmas for what it is and who its with....

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