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Showing posts from November, 2008

"I'm gonna be a whole handful mama!"

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Our big P turns 5 next month, FIVE! Where has the time gone? I mean it seems just like yesterday we found out we were pregnant with her! And not too long after that she said mama for the first time. Then her first steps, her first pony ride, her first haircut! Now, this sweet person who I love so dearly is gonna be a "whole handful!". I keep telling her she's BEEN a handful. Of course I mean that lovingly. There have been some moments where she and I have clashed, I truly think that's because we are so much alike, very strong-willed and very dramatic. I remember life before out biggest P and it wasn't complete until she and her little sister came into our lives. While I may have many more days of drama with her, I pray that I have that opportunity no matter what. She is smart, funny, beautiful, sweet and one of the strongest people I've ever met! Thank you sweet P, for being truly one of my best friends!
Awhile back, I can't remember when exactly, I was pondering the meaning of life, mine in particular. I think it was around the time I felt life, my life, was slipping out of my hands. I felt that I needed to be "something" or do "something" that was worthy, that there had to be a job my husband and others could feel good saying I did. I thought at one point that job was a nurse. Not just any nurse, but an OB nurse. I thought that after the wonderful experiences I had having the P's, that it would only be natural to jump into that field. I thought about this, dreamt about this job for a long time. But reality set in, and after some careful thought, I realized I'm too emotionally attached to people to be a nurse. So I kept searching and kept wondering what my purpose was. I mean, apparently it wasn't as a Sports Anchor like I had dreamt of in high school and my first few years in college. I spent 10 years in television only to decide it wasn't my p
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This is the face of our oldest P. In a month and a half, she will be 5-years-old and a "whole handful" she reminds me. And of course, I remind her that she's been a "handful" her entire life, which makes me laugh, but leaves her with a puzzled look. She is going through a stage lately that makes me incredibly sad. Big P, is such a sweet girl, she truly is. She is smart, funny, beautiful inside and out and a relatively good kid. However, when it comes to our relationship, she is in the phase where mommy doesn't know anything, and she feels the need to remind me of this. No, she hasn't come out and called me stupid, but she is quick to talk back to me and quick to shoot me looks of anger. I don't think she knows the power of those looks, they break my heart. I've heard from friends with little girls the same age who say they're experiencing the same thing with their daughters. But it doesn't make the hurt any less. When did my sweet little