Mama of 2 P's in a Pod

I am not usually one to wish time away. But man, I will not be sad to say goodbye to 2014. It has been a crazy year. I won't dwell on the down parts but I will say they definitely outweigh the up parts. Ok that's not fair, there were plenty of ups in 2014. They just get overshadowed. Maybe I should rethink this whole post. Ok so here I go. I am looking forward to 2015 and all of the opportunities a new year brings. Does that sound better? A certain event does overshadow the many joys we've had this year. I do think all 4 of us are ready to move on and get going. A new year is a perfect chance to do just that. Big P turned 11 a couple of weeks ago. Insane to think we have someone so close to being a teen in our house. Like clockwork, the teenage attitude has arrived. But thankfully, she is very much a little girl still. She asked for Barbies and Grandma delivered. I love listening to her and her sister play. Just play, using imaginations, having fun. Whether it is with B...

We got our traditional Santa Pictures this year. Our girls have had their pictures with the Topeka Santa since they were toddlers. This year was a little different as Piper no longer fits on his lap and they were both shy. (SHOCKING I know!) But we had a lot of fun with these and can't wait to make our Christmas cards. Sooner than I would like, Santa won't matter.

Ok. I apologize for my last post. It was very pissy. Without going into too much detail, there are other deciding factors on our funky funkiness..... But after some great conversations and some not so great conversations, I am happy to say we are on our way. Finding our way this holiday season. We all make our choices, and what you may chose, I may not. But it doesn't make either direction wrong as it is our OWN path. Sadly, with the fire we have lost some people we've considered friends and some we even considered family. They lost site of good deeds and our feelings. And we've let them go. Finding our way. One inch at a time. But with faith, and love and lot of pixie dust. Ok maybe not pixie dust. Disney won't share that stuff for whatever reason. But with the other two, we will make it and be stronger for it.

Some days rolling out of bed is a chore. And on those days, it truly is a blessing that you have two little people (well under the age of 15) who rely on you. Because otherwise, you might not get out of said bed. Today is one of those days. The funky funkiness that has consumed our household continues. I would love to type on here that all is well. But we are clearly in the "spent the last 9 months dealing with more emotion and ups and downs than we should have had to and now we've got nothing" mode. It sucks. I'm not going to sugar coat it. The girls are having some fun with friends and the countdown to a big break from school. We did have a mommy-daughters movie date tonight while Kris worked. That was fun. I hope the spirit and the joy of this season kicks in soon. For all of us. Life is too precious and to beautiful to let this funk continue. Ready to be over it.

So tomorrow is the first day of December. I have ZERO holiday spirit. I have ZERO spirit for much of anything.  They call this healing. I call it ridiculous. I am so over it. I am so over 2014. But I hate, despise. loathe even, wishing life away. So I am NOT going to say I can't wait for 2015. Because that would make me a hypocrite. I can say this. Medicine is a beautiful thing. WHEN it works. What is not beautiful. Going to a fantastic vacation that took you 4 years to save for, 15 lbs heavier than when you started the school year. Curse you medicine and your stupid changes. Just fix this crap now because RF I am about to make you my bitch. It was hard to enjoy the beach or rides when I felt frumpy and large. I plan on going back to Florida a lot healthier! Tomorrow I am hitting it hard and not only am I going to tackle this stupid 15 EXTRA pounds, I am going to keep going and by this time next year, the only number I will have on my mind is 13.1. I hope to ins...

Cocoa Beach November 2014! These girls love the ocean! Kris & I on the pier... a little tired but super excited! P2, Nannu & I in Melbourne. Clearly silliness runs in the family! Love this picture of Nannu & the P's! P1 and Kris on the beach in the early morning hours. P2 was still asleep! Picture on the left is November 2010, right is 4 years later! Grinch and beard fun at a Florida Walmart! Our secret is out, this place is packed! The P's and Princess Ariel..... The P's and Kris at Hollywood Studios... The P's and Mary Poppins... Family selfie at Animal Kingdom... The P's & Rapunzel.... We decided this year they could ride the teacups by themselves.. Finally a warm enough day for pool time and mommy time... Loving the 84 degree day! Last night and we finally see Mickey! Our favorite waitress, Angela at the Plaza restaurant in Magic Kingdom.. ...

Right now I'm sitting pool side in Lake Buena Vista, Florida. We've been here since last Saturday. It's been a long vacation and some nice time away. We spent some time down in Melbourne, playing on the beach and visiting my Nannu (Grandma). I took a ton of pictures the first day, but did this weird thing the second. I left my phone in the hotel. Partly because it was dead and partly because I wanted to actually be involved in the day. It was a fun feeling. To be free. In fact, we've chosen to not Facebook this trip. One, for the safety of our home, since someone decided to burglarize it not once, but twice right after our fire. And two, because we wanted to truly get away. The only reason we've been on FB is to keep track of a young girl who sadly lost her fight with cancer yesterday. That's a blog for another day. RIP Moe. Right now, I'm sitting pool side at our fourth hotel this trip. First one, KC airport since we had the 5:30am flight last Saturday. S...

We are home. Six and a half months after our fire we moved home. I went by weeks, I'm strange I guess, but week wise, it was six and a half months. There are still boxes in each room. Mainly, because we are so overbooked right now. Softball, soccer and PTO on top of Kris' work schedule. But we are making some progress. I am very much ready to have our home in order. Just need to find the time and the energy. But, everything we own is in our home. It is a very peaceful feeling! It is funny to come across things we need and no longer have. I went to make the girls muffins for breakfast the other morning and realized I do not own a mixing bowl of any kind, or even a bowl large enough to work with. I improvised with a baking dish. But the list of needs is definitely growing. The girls are happy to be home. A little anxious and missing our boy. Big P says it doesn't quite feel like home yet. We will get there. I am not going to lie, our bed is phenomenal. It may pose a pro...

Brand new school year starts tomorrow for me, Wednesday for the P's. I pray that it is a happy and successful year. More quiet and less dramatic than the last. And I pray it's a smooth transition and the first of many.

It has been five months. Five long but short months. It has gone by fast, but yet, it hasn't. It is a strange thing to try and explain. A lot has changed while we wait. Some for the best, and some not. My faith in people has grown tremendously, but in the same breath, I've had to learn to lower expectations of some. The support is still here, though life has gone on. Relationships have changed. We have changed. Mostly for the better. But I fight the negativity monster every day. Someone has invited it in, and I am trying extremely hard to push it out. Perhaps it is part of the healing process? There has to be a "down" time right? Maybe its the anticipation of more change. School starts this week. I go back Monday, the P's Wednesday. Fall activities are in full force. Maybe the stress of balancing those with school is too much. Maybe it is the upped deadline of when we get to go home. Late September. We still have so much to order furniture wise. Finding the time t...

Tonight is our first sleepover for the girls. Of course I chose a night that K is on duty, but sometimes its a little easier that way. His first real sleepover experience last year with 4 little girls, almost sent him over the edge. I don't mind, as long as our girls get along. But they have had a lot of together time over the past four months, sharing a room etc. Tonight so far, has been relatively easy. Kris' parents are on vacation so that makes it easier and is actually why we did this. I don't know that we will have any more while we are here. But for tonight, it is fun. Our 2013-14 softball season has come to a close. Both P's played in the C world series with their teams. It was 4 straight days of roller coaster rides (literally), games, 13 hour days at the ballpark, hotel beds (very comfortable beds I might add) and a lot of time with our softball families. It was a great time with great people and sadly, a quick end to a long season. If that makes any sense. ...