Just call me Cindy Lou Who....


So tomorrow is the first day of December.
I have ZERO holiday spirit.
I have ZERO spirit for much of anything. 
They call this healing.
I call it ridiculous.
I am so over it. I am so over 2014. But I hate, despise. loathe even, wishing life away.
So I am NOT going to say I can't wait for 2015. Because that would make me a hypocrite.
I can say this.

Medicine is a beautiful thing. WHEN it works.
What is not beautiful. Going to a fantastic vacation that took you 4 years to save for, 15 lbs heavier than when you started the school year. Curse you medicine and your stupid changes. Just fix this crap now because RF I am about to make you my bitch. It was hard to enjoy the beach or rides when I felt frumpy and large. I plan on going back to Florida a lot healthier! Tomorrow I am hitting it hard and not only am I going to tackle this stupid 15 EXTRA pounds, I am going to keep going and by this time next year, the only number I will have on my mind is 13.1. I hope to inspire my family to get moving and get going. No more waiting. No more talking. ONLY doing!
 
I was an angry black Friday shopper. One, because all of a sudden businesses needed to open on Thanksgiving as people were spending time serving others or enjoying time with family. That is insane. Two, because my mom and I go for fun, not to be part of crowds, but for the experience and this year, P1 wanted to come. The experience was not worth the 3:30am wake up. I do not have the desire anymore to fill our home or our lives with "stuff." And that my friends, is what Black Friday is about. STUFF! Over it. Done it. Shopping for the gifts we do need, ONLINE!

The new tree is up. It is very beautiful and a late in the day Black Friday purchase. We shopped around town and were about to give up when Kris suggested we try one more place. That place had the tree we fell in love with at place number 1, WAY cheaper. Glad we went. We put it up and stared at the two boxes of ornaments they were able to save from the fire. It took us almost 2 days to decide which ones to put up. Sad to say our 16 years of holidays were summed up in two boxes. None of us felt the spirit when we got the trees and decorations up. We even splurged a little for beautiful lights to put on the house outside. Still, no one here seems excited.

Again with the healing. 8 months of raw emotion has seemed to have left us all a little numb. Our trip was refreshing but we seemed to be missing something. Now we just have to figure out what and find it. Our family was sad for so long. And our emotions seem to be out of whack or missing altogether. I pray we can all find our way back soon, so we can enjoy the holidays. Enjoy the magic. Enjoy period.

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