So you asked and I shall answer....
I was asked the other day what I "Did" by another parent at the girls' dance class. When I said I was home, I got the blank look on her face and an "oh." She quickly turned to talk to a more exciting parent.
That got me to thinking about a few other encounters I've had since I've become a Stay at Home Mom.
There are the other SAHMS (the online term for stay at home moms)who fall into two categories. Jumbled SAHMS and just SAHMS.
Jumbled are as follows, they LIVE for being home, they spend a lot of their time while not with children, either online in mommy clubs or at a meeting with other jumbled SAHMS. This time is usually spent in a play group or other function disguised as time for the kids to play, but it is truly a time for women to either gossip, judge or get time out of the home to hold onto any sanity they have. I am not trying to be rude about Jumbled SAHMS, because there are truly a few who spend their entire day trying to do good for their own kids as well as find some time to spend with people in the over 10 crowd. I commend those Jumbled SAHMS, its the more judgemental/gossipy types that I am referring to. These are women who breastfeed until their children are in preschool and beyond and spit on women who either chose not to or are not able to. They spend their days on Facebook telling the world how much healthier THEIR kids are than bottle fed kids, however later in the day you will read how their 4-8 kids are sick with this and sick with that and is a walking contradictory. I'm all about breastfeeding, I truly am. But I think this world puts enough pressure on women to the be perfect moms as it is, that hearing yet another reason to have mommy guilt is beyond ridiculous, especially from people who are breastfeeding kids who have are getting visits from the tooth fairy.
These are also the same women who brag about "wearing" their babies and cloth diapering their babies. AGAIN more of the mom guilt. Seriously, do we need to judge other mommies? Not everyone is financially or emotionally able to be a SAHM, don't judge just love! I've been in the working 40+ hours, being a mommy, housekeeper and all of the above group. It is really hard and sometimes cloth diapering, wearing of the babies and breastfeeding don't fit into those schedules. Just let it go and be happy for all mommies.
The Just SAHMS get this. And for you, I am grateful. Some of you are like me, in the SAHM mom category by chance. And what a great chance it is. I spent the first 6 years of our oldest daughter's life working and letting our girls spend a majority of their day in daycare, someone ELSE's care. So now I'm blessed to be here as their mommy and it feels darn good! This is for you SAHD's too, you're out there and you are just as appreciated.
Now on to another ugly side of SAHM life. The haters. You KNOW who you are. You wish you were here, but for many reasons you are not. Some are not parents yet but feel the need to hate on those who "don't work". Others are parents who for whatever reason work, and I have no beef with you and your working. Please do not have any beef with me and my being home.
But let me tell you a little something, I am busier NOW than I ever was working a full time job and being a mommy. I am not sitting here eating bon bons, reading books, watching soaps and whatever it is you think makes me a target for your hate. I work darn hard, as a matter of fact I have a job I do from HOME. I work at our daughters' school when they need me which is quite a bit. I work, I just don't do 8-5or whatever it is you feel "stuck" with. I will not apologize for the differences between our lifestyles. Maybe, someday, when you're a parent or your financial needs are different, you can be home too. Until then, stop the hate, I don't have time for it and quite frankly it will not ruin this blessed experience I get to have as a SAHM. And none of this would be possible without the most amazing, supportive and hardworking husband! This is our life, and it works for us. So please, if you don't understand, ask and if you refuse to be supportive, then move along, I have no use for close mindedness!
That got me to thinking about a few other encounters I've had since I've become a Stay at Home Mom.
There are the other SAHMS (the online term for stay at home moms)who fall into two categories. Jumbled SAHMS and just SAHMS.
Jumbled are as follows, they LIVE for being home, they spend a lot of their time while not with children, either online in mommy clubs or at a meeting with other jumbled SAHMS. This time is usually spent in a play group or other function disguised as time for the kids to play, but it is truly a time for women to either gossip, judge or get time out of the home to hold onto any sanity they have. I am not trying to be rude about Jumbled SAHMS, because there are truly a few who spend their entire day trying to do good for their own kids as well as find some time to spend with people in the over 10 crowd. I commend those Jumbled SAHMS, its the more judgemental/gossipy types that I am referring to. These are women who breastfeed until their children are in preschool and beyond and spit on women who either chose not to or are not able to. They spend their days on Facebook telling the world how much healthier THEIR kids are than bottle fed kids, however later in the day you will read how their 4-8 kids are sick with this and sick with that and is a walking contradictory. I'm all about breastfeeding, I truly am. But I think this world puts enough pressure on women to the be perfect moms as it is, that hearing yet another reason to have mommy guilt is beyond ridiculous, especially from people who are breastfeeding kids who have are getting visits from the tooth fairy.
These are also the same women who brag about "wearing" their babies and cloth diapering their babies. AGAIN more of the mom guilt. Seriously, do we need to judge other mommies? Not everyone is financially or emotionally able to be a SAHM, don't judge just love! I've been in the working 40+ hours, being a mommy, housekeeper and all of the above group. It is really hard and sometimes cloth diapering, wearing of the babies and breastfeeding don't fit into those schedules. Just let it go and be happy for all mommies.
The Just SAHMS get this. And for you, I am grateful. Some of you are like me, in the SAHM mom category by chance. And what a great chance it is. I spent the first 6 years of our oldest daughter's life working and letting our girls spend a majority of their day in daycare, someone ELSE's care. So now I'm blessed to be here as their mommy and it feels darn good! This is for you SAHD's too, you're out there and you are just as appreciated.
Now on to another ugly side of SAHM life. The haters. You KNOW who you are. You wish you were here, but for many reasons you are not. Some are not parents yet but feel the need to hate on those who "don't work". Others are parents who for whatever reason work, and I have no beef with you and your working. Please do not have any beef with me and my being home.
But let me tell you a little something, I am busier NOW than I ever was working a full time job and being a mommy. I am not sitting here eating bon bons, reading books, watching soaps and whatever it is you think makes me a target for your hate. I work darn hard, as a matter of fact I have a job I do from HOME. I work at our daughters' school when they need me which is quite a bit. I work, I just don't do 8-5or whatever it is you feel "stuck" with. I will not apologize for the differences between our lifestyles. Maybe, someday, when you're a parent or your financial needs are different, you can be home too. Until then, stop the hate, I don't have time for it and quite frankly it will not ruin this blessed experience I get to have as a SAHM. And none of this would be possible without the most amazing, supportive and hardworking husband! This is our life, and it works for us. So please, if you don't understand, ask and if you refuse to be supportive, then move along, I have no use for close mindedness!
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