Easter - a somber day

Easter Sunday was a somber time for our family, it was truly the last holiday where Oma (my grandmother) will probably remember anything. She was diagnosed with Alzheimers almost two years ago and its been a very steady decline. Her true personality pops in a few times here and there but we rarely see Oma in her truest form. Gone are the eyes that sparkled each time she saw one of her grandchildren. And sadly, gone are any memories of her own children. She does seem to remember her siblings in Germany, which sadly are dwindling away, her sister passed away this weekend. My mom and aunt spent their day yesterday preparing to tell Oma this sad news. I have great memories of Oma. There are still certain smells and fabrics and flowers that bring me right back to standing in her kitchen and attempting to help her cook. I got a chance of a lifetime to grow up close to my grandparents and I'm truly grateful for that. Oma devoted her life to her family and now they are devoting their lives to helping her adjust to life with Alzheimers. She is also in that angry state of the disease where she just doesn't understand why they won't let her live on her own, won't let her drive, etc. I can understand that frustration and I'm sure I'd be the same in her shoes. She does not let up and there are times that the pure exhaustion of trying to keep a happy face on around her is hard to do. I'm just the grandchild I do not have the day in and day out stress of dealing with the situation my mom and her siblings do. I just get to see their sadness and frustration and it is truly a bad deal all around. We were very blessed to have such an active, independent spirit among us for so long. Alzheimers is truly a horrible, horrible disease!


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