Random ramblings of a mad, fat woman!

Why is it that some people seem to have the willpower of a iron horse? I mean seriously, how hard can it be to lose weight, say no to the chocolate in the breakroom, find time to juggle exercise, work and family? WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE and why can't they share their secrets?
I weigh 239 lbs today. I weighed 189lbs 9 years ago and freaked out about being so close to 200. Well I think I never actually made it to 200, I just ran right past that number and kept on going didn't I? Now I"m not saying I haven't been heavier, I most certainly have. Between the P's I was up to 270 and at a size 24! Those numbers terrify me! I am at least out of the 20's on sizes and am in a size 18, but I want to be a 12 NOW! I want to be below that 200 mark NOW! I want to be able to resist the bad that is so good in a fountain Coke. I want to be able to get up 30 minutes earlier every day so I can get a workout in! I want to be able to play with my girls and run with them without getting winded. I want to see what my post-baby belly looks like without my pre-baby rolls! Is this too much to ask people? I mean seriously?! I know Kris is in the same boat, and we just keep rowing ourselves in circles when it comes to our weight. Time to get off the rowboat and swim ourselves to shore darn it!

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