Mama of 2 P's in a Pod

I am trying this new thing, where I actually take the time to listen, truly listen to what Piper and Parker have to say. I know this statement may sound horrible but in the day in and day out routines sometimes I feel like I don't listen to them well enough and just bark orders. I don't want to look back 20 years from now and wonder who our daughters were. I tried this last night when I got home from a meeting. Both girls were already in bed, (thank you Kris!!) and Piper was still awake when I got home. She was laying in bed with a few Barbies and watching the Grinch. She was very happy to see me, which is an amazing feeling in and of itself. But instead of hushing her into bed when she ran to the door and threw her arms around me telling me how much she missed me, I instead reached down picked her up and carried her back to bed. I laid down beside her and let her tell me about her day. I laid there and watched her sweet eyes fill with excitement about school and her eyebrows, ...

2008 has been amazing so far. I am truly blessed with two healthy, beautiful children and truly wonderful husband. I think it took the events of 2007 to truly appreciate what God has blessed me with. I am more in love with my husband than I have ever been! I have an amazing family and such a great support group of friends! I could not ask for more really. Now I need to replenish the love I have for myself so I can give those who love me more of what they need!

So Piper has hit the "my mom is the worst mom in the whole world" phase and it just makes my blood boil. Am I horrible to her? I mean am I really? I know there are times when I lose my cool and I'm so quick to yell, so quick to snap at her. I don't want to be like this and I certainly don't want to ruin the relationship I have with my oldest daughter already, preferably never but certainly not at 4. She is such a sweet girl, she really does have a heart of gold. And I love her like I have never loved another human being, she and Parker are my soulmates, along with their daddy. I just want to help her through this. I know me losing my cool, getting angry is not helping the situation. I just need to breathe....but how can I? She is so mean! I mean REALLY mean to me and to her little sister. DO I take her to see a counselor? Is this something I've done, something we've done with our own issues and our own feelings? I could really use some prayers for this lit...