So a lump is a lump that a lump is a lump and a lump is a lump that refuses to give up.
Ok that was bad. But I have had not much else on my mind since my doctor's appointment yesterday.
The lump that was annoying and caused me to get my first mammogram last year, has returned and decided to grow.
So guess what? I am getting my boob squeezed into pancake form again next week.
But here is the fun part. Because that whole vision I just gave you isn't enough fun?
Since I am the young age of 35, I couldn't just call and schedule myself a mammogram. I got to dance through the hoops of doctors calling doctors and waiting and hoping they get it on a day I'm off since we start that whole school thing again next week. If I were a mere 5 years older, I could schedule one for myself.
I understand the reasoning to a point, but I also think that with someone who has history of lumps, I should be able to schedule one. I think any woman who is ever worried should be able to schedule one. I know of a lot of women who are not the magic age of 40, who have fought and beat breast cancer, so again, just a number here. Not mad or anything, just found it funny when the lady at the Women's Center said, "oh honey you're too young to schedule that yourself."
So next week, after I get the girls on the bus, I head down to walk around with no shirt on and have a woman put my boobs (yes both because we wouldn't want one to feel left out) in a vice grip and have them squeeze and stretch all while saying, "relax, take deep breaths." But alas, if the result is the same as last year, it will be worth it.
On an awesome side note. I've been busting my butt and eating good for several weeks straight now. I have also been waking up not just hungry, but ravenous, like move out of my way or I am going to eat your arm hungry. I talked to my doctor, this means my metabolism is finally working correctly! Well hello metabolism, haven't seen you in what, 8 years! All that hard work is paying off! So I grab a banana and go about my morning then hit the real breakfast!
On an awkward note, I got to have the sex talk with the P's this week. I was cornered, watching a movie with them that we had watched a 1000 times before. And was busy enjoying Zac Efron (hey he's 26) in my own happy little world, when the question came about.
"What is sex mommy?"
"What do you think sex is?"
Other P "Well we know what we think it is, but I think that's probably not what it really is, so why don't you just tell us"
WOW! Did not see that one coming.
So I had the choice, be honest and set up a lifetime of them coming to me with all of their questions rather than an uninformed friend. Or sidestep the question in hopes that we can talk about it later, like when they're 30. I chose number one. I don't want them to learn about sex like I did. I gave them an anatomy lesson and described in small detail how it works, and why its usually between a husband and wife, adults and what could happen if its done too young. I also let it sink in and then asked Little P, "What would you do if you are being kissed by a boy in 8th grade (GULP) and he asks to have sex?"
"Why would I be kissing a boy at Valeri's age? That is gross"
"Well say you were, then what?"
"I would tell him first of all I only kiss my daddy, and second we are not married and not grown up"
PHEW I think the talk will suffice for now. But Kris and I will definitely have to follow it up soon.
They're 8 & 9!!!! WHY?
Oh because mother nature has decided to make my 9 year old's body change already.
Mother Nature, you can kiss it!
Ok that was bad. But I have had not much else on my mind since my doctor's appointment yesterday.
The lump that was annoying and caused me to get my first mammogram last year, has returned and decided to grow.
So guess what? I am getting my boob squeezed into pancake form again next week.
But here is the fun part. Because that whole vision I just gave you isn't enough fun?
Since I am the young age of 35, I couldn't just call and schedule myself a mammogram. I got to dance through the hoops of doctors calling doctors and waiting and hoping they get it on a day I'm off since we start that whole school thing again next week. If I were a mere 5 years older, I could schedule one for myself.
I understand the reasoning to a point, but I also think that with someone who has history of lumps, I should be able to schedule one. I think any woman who is ever worried should be able to schedule one. I know of a lot of women who are not the magic age of 40, who have fought and beat breast cancer, so again, just a number here. Not mad or anything, just found it funny when the lady at the Women's Center said, "oh honey you're too young to schedule that yourself."
So next week, after I get the girls on the bus, I head down to walk around with no shirt on and have a woman put my boobs (yes both because we wouldn't want one to feel left out) in a vice grip and have them squeeze and stretch all while saying, "relax, take deep breaths." But alas, if the result is the same as last year, it will be worth it.
On an awesome side note. I've been busting my butt and eating good for several weeks straight now. I have also been waking up not just hungry, but ravenous, like move out of my way or I am going to eat your arm hungry. I talked to my doctor, this means my metabolism is finally working correctly! Well hello metabolism, haven't seen you in what, 8 years! All that hard work is paying off! So I grab a banana and go about my morning then hit the real breakfast!
On an awkward note, I got to have the sex talk with the P's this week. I was cornered, watching a movie with them that we had watched a 1000 times before. And was busy enjoying Zac Efron (hey he's 26) in my own happy little world, when the question came about.
"What is sex mommy?"
"What do you think sex is?"
Other P "Well we know what we think it is, but I think that's probably not what it really is, so why don't you just tell us"
WOW! Did not see that one coming.
So I had the choice, be honest and set up a lifetime of them coming to me with all of their questions rather than an uninformed friend. Or sidestep the question in hopes that we can talk about it later, like when they're 30. I chose number one. I don't want them to learn about sex like I did. I gave them an anatomy lesson and described in small detail how it works, and why its usually between a husband and wife, adults and what could happen if its done too young. I also let it sink in and then asked Little P, "What would you do if you are being kissed by a boy in 8th grade (GULP) and he asks to have sex?"
"Why would I be kissing a boy at Valeri's age? That is gross"
"Well say you were, then what?"
"I would tell him first of all I only kiss my daddy, and second we are not married and not grown up"
PHEW I think the talk will suffice for now. But Kris and I will definitely have to follow it up soon.
They're 8 & 9!!!! WHY?
Oh because mother nature has decided to make my 9 year old's body change already.
Mother Nature, you can kiss it!
Comments